Emma's Closet

Living in Fairy World today

I decided to sit in our big picture window today and read.  I keep getting distracted by the outside world, which is so beautiful today.  I am sure those in parts of Kansas and Texas would disagree since they have had the worst of the storm that has moved through our area, but it is just magical today.

What is it about snow, a harsh force of nature, that makes it so beautiful?  I have stared out at the backyard, the ground covered with white frosting in parts, the trees laced ever so delicately with wet tendrils of fluffiness.....  It seems to make everything so magical and fairy like outside.    But a fragile beautiful because it will go away.  I was talked into going into the front yarn and making snowmen and women, but I almost did not want to because that caused a disturbance in the beauty.  I even have a hard time when we go skiing, that first look down the mountain (you have to get up EARLY for that view of pristine snow), I do not want to jump off and shatter the picture.

 
Now for those of you that live in Winter Wonderland from November to April, I am sure you disagree with me completely.    We do not get a lot of snow in Oklahoma so it is always a source of wonderment for me. 

The birds today do not even seem to be able to grasp what is going on.  They are singing their spring songs along with the thunder (yes thunder... thunder and snow)

Emma has been totally engrossed in either 1) going outside to play or 2) watching a movie.  I have stayed out of the living room, but I know she is watching Twilight (OMG who would have thought a 7 year old would have a crush on a movie star?  Poor Rob Pattinson, I am sure he had no idea how much his life was going to change after this movie).

I think this evening I may crawl out of my lethargic dream like state, turn on all the fairy lights in the backyard,  make some hot cocoa, get dressed, tug on my snow boots and just enjoy the surreal scenery.

Even Tinker is enjoying this weather today. 

I was going to cancel, but....

I was going to cancel mainly because of cost, well and time.  BUT I just cannot.  So, I have made a deal with myself, I have to post at least 3 times a week. 

Job is still giving me a full plate to deal with, but I think I have learned the following;

• I am only human
• There are only so many hours in the day
• I can only do what I can do

The good part is they are going to send us to PMP boot camp to get our project management certification!  YEAH!  I have looked at the dates, and I may have to travel, but I will not complain mainly because it would be to Portland!!!! 

Our household has expanded once again.... I am pleased to introduced
Tinkerbell Myfanaway (Myvanwee is how it is pronounced in Welsh)

 

She is going to be bigger than Audrey.  I can already tell that from her bone structure.  She quite the little amazing girl.  Audrey and Tinker play together very well. 

Have to go get ready for work.. and see if it is snowing.  Yes, snow.  It was 74 degrees Tuesday morning and now we could have snow.  Only in Oklahoma!

Yipppeeee

Miss Audrey decided to find out what was under my parent's barn/shed yesterday.  I kept telling my dad that I thought I heard her... I just could not pinpoint it.. and my dad said he looked under there.

Well, this morning, for argument's sake I asked him to look again... and guess what, she was there and could not get out!  Dad dug a hole and out she came.

Thank goodness.... my other "daughter" is home safe!

It has been a long time..........

It has been a long time since I last posted.  Live has been just so busy with 1st grade, soccer and girl scouts.  It has been an interesting year, but nothing seemed news worthy.....  until now. 

Over the holiday I have been babysitting my next door neighbor's corgi, which has really been a lot of fun.  Truman is a big fella, but very loving.    Today he and Åudrey were playing in the backyard.  My dad remembers putting Audrey back outside around 4:30 pm.  By 5 pm she was missing.  No sign of her anywhere.  We walked both backyards (mine and my parent's) -- no where for her to get out.  We did see a big hawk flying around, but he could not have held on to Audrey, and Truman would have caused quite a commotion.

Tonight we have walked every inch of my neighborhood.  We wave driven every inch of it.  We have driven the highway and all side roads.  I have walked to the nearby pound and walked through the woods by our house.  She has not been found.  I really fear that someone took her, but to be honest, none of it adds up.  She is too quick and hyper for someone to just get her.  And Truman is not keen to strangers whatsoever.

I called Home Again and listed her as missing as well as Dog Detective.  I am just beside myself.  Emma is at her dad's until tomorrow.  She called tonight and her first question was "where is Audrey?".  This is going to be awful for her.  Two dogs in 2 years.  First from parvo and now this.  Like I said, none of this adds up and makes any sense.  I just pray that someone found her and she is safe and warm tonight because it is going to be cold here overnight.   So, if you do read this tonight, send good thoughts and prayers into the word for Audrey.  She will be one on December 18th which just makes this even harder (this is like a child of mine is lost).

Thank you......   Beth (and Audrey)

Round and Round

Round and round, that is how I feel lately.  I have lived through a week of headaches and a contrast MRI (not fun by the way, I have some lovely bruises from the injections).  I went to my primary care doctor and my eye doctor to go over everything....  to find out...  I have extreme stress and anxiety from my work.  My primary care doctor and I had a long talk about it.  I am going to give Lexapro a try and talk to work about this situation.  Oh, and I have migraines brought on by the stress.  Today is the first day I have not had a headache (she gave me some great drug that got rid of it).  How much do companies spend on stress related illness on their employees?  Why do they just not hire the appropriate amount of FTE to cover the job?  I think I have got to do some real life evaluation in the coming weeks. 

The "doily" above is something I did while my head hurt.  It was the only thing that would deviate my attention away from my headache.  I just started - no pattern, nothing in mind.  Just whatever came to be, well, came to be.

We have been having torrential downpours around here lately.  Bad thunderstorm last night with a lot of hail.. apparently we are in for more of it tonight, and the next night, and the next night.  May have to go pull out those fly fishing waiters just to get around.

How about those two?  Truman and Audrey...  two peas in a pod...    Audrey is 4 months old today can you believe it? 

I will leave with you with a sign of Spring... I took this while it stopped raining for a whole 45 minutes

March,in like a lamb out like a lion

Mother Nature has herself goofed up for our March.  We hardly had any bad weather the entire month and then March 31st came up on us.  We actually had a severe thunderstorm, flash flood and tornado warning all at one time.  All we needed was an earthquake, a hurricane and a typhoon and we would of had all weather phenomenon covered.

In the afternoon it cleared right up and then became quite cooler.. but that did not stop our fearless neighborhood kids....

Nor did it stop Audrey from getting in on the mud action

and then there was Audrey and Truman, separate by only a fence... we are definitely going to have to watch these two when Audrey gets older.

Now for me....  I had the worst headache all day long.  Nothing touched it.  I woke up with it still this morning.  I made it to work until 10:30 and could not take it anymore.  I left and went to Urgent Care.  It turns out the throbbing headache, the tingly head, nausea, is a migraine.  I had an Emitex shot for that.  BUT, I also have a roaring sinus infection behind my right eye!  I never imagined because I have not had any signs of it, except for those 4 really big nose bleeds that took forever to stop.  So, I am on antibiotics as well as Mucinex D.  It is now 8:28 PM, and I still have a really bad headache.. guess the Emitrex did not help.  My head is still tingly.  So, migraine still there and now aware of the fact I have a sinus infection.  See, March in like a lamb, out like a lion. 

Easter Weekend Fun

Last week I took off Friday.  I had planned for Emma and I to just go to the zoo, but then thought, "hey the kite festival is in Eureka Springs on Saturday.".  I booked a room at the Bavarian Inn.  We ended up staying the entire 3 days in Eureka Springs.  It is an easy peaceful drive, well, except for the "are we there yet" and the "I have to go potty".   We goofed off on Friday, went into town there, bought candy apples from the Rocky Mountain Chocolate Factory, and then had some schnitzel at the Inn's restaurant.  We took a bath in the giant double person jacuzzi, got into bed, watched part of a movie and went to sleep. 


Saturday, Emma had me up at 6:30 AM!  We got ready, and found a great place, Pancakes and Waffles, to eat breakfast.  We decide to goof off a little before heading out to Turpentine Creek  to go to the Kite Festival and see the big cats.  We drove around Beaver Lake, which is beautiful.

We then went out to Turpentine Creek... to go to the kite festival.. only to realize that the kite Emma picked out (and then opened up at home) was missing its crossbar since she took it out and left it on our fireplace.. good place for it.   So, we ended up just watching the kites for a little while.

Then we went to see the cats.   This refuge takes in cats and other animals from people who bought them to be pets in the first place (they must be crazy, no matter how beautiful they are and how much you would like to curl up beside them, I am no fool... I am lunch to these guys). 

I forgot this big guy's name.... and that is one big yawn!

This is Ringo.  We got to watch him being fed a pot roast.  That lasted a whole 15 seconds!  He has quite the personality and when you talk to him he will kind of chortle back to you.

This beautiful fella is Kenny . He is kind of Turpentine's post boy.  Kenny is the son of Loretta and Conway, two white tigers, that happen to be brother and sister.  They were privately owned and the owner bred the two to produce tigers for the exotic animal trade.  All of their cubs started dying or were being born deformed, so Loretta and Conway were of no user to their owner.  Turpentine actually rescued Kenny and his brother Willie (yes, Kenny Rogers and Willie Nelson) before Turpentine picked up Loretta and Conway.  Both Kenny and Willie are deformed and are mentally retarded.  Kenny has a lot of health problems as well.  He is the one that just broke my heart. I wanted to crawl in his cage and give him a big hug.   There were others there that I just could not get good pictures of.  There was Vada - a black leopard - her owner, the idiot, declawed her and then at some point broke off her teeth with a pair of pliers.  They had to do a lot of surgery on her to save the teeth they could save.  Some, where the nerve had been exposed for so long, had to just be removed.  The front of her teeth look no different than yours and mine.  It costs $2k per animal per year.  Wal-Mart donates all of their meat that is past date, which is still okay for the animals.  People around the refuge bring them things as well.  I think if we lived in Eureka I would have to make it a weekend trip every weekend.

Sunday, Emma wanted to go home soooo bad.  We ate breakfast and goofed off.  I was trying to waste time in the hopes she would want to stay for a while.  I wanted her to go to the Easter Egg Hunt at The Crescent .  This hotel is incredible, built in 1886.  I know it has been on Ghost Hunters. 

Once we got there, Emma completely forgot the whole idea of going home.  She was too excited.  There were eggs, candy and stuffed animals everywhere.  We had to wait 25 minutes, and I think the waiting almost made her explode.  We had a plan all mapped out, but the minute the hunt started, that plan
went right out the window.  I went up to where a bunny had been hidden in a bush.. no kids were even looking at it.  Emma had run into the middle of kids to pick up eggs, darting to the left, to the right, they looked like a bunch of kids that had gone crazy.  I yelled at her to get her attention.  She looked at me like, "what, I am busy here".  I made her come to me, and I pointed down.  Emma giggled with glee at the sight of her bunny (there were only 15 stuffed animals and about 35-45 kids there).  She grabbed her bunny and made me go with her to hunt for more items, she giggled the whole way.  The kids had so much fun.  No fights, just pure fun and excitement over the hope of what they would find next.  It ended almost as fast as it started.  Well, at least it did for the 6-10 year old range... the 1-5 took their time.   
Here are some pictures of Emma with her bunny

peeking over the door

Then it was time to say goodbye, which I hate to do.  I just love Eureka Springs.  It is a very slow paced, very friendly, nice place to be.  Everyone talks with you like they have known you forever.  We will definitely be going back this summer!

Slowly Step by Step...

Turning the corner... in so many ways

Little Audrey is now 3 months 2 weeks old.  In the below picture it is March 7th and we had snow.

March 9th, no snow.... and poor Audrey looks sad, like she misses the snow

The crocus are coming up.  Actually my dad has white ones, which I have heard that means Spring is officially here.

Emma has Spring Break this week....no pics yet....
BUT Spring storm season has officially arrived.  Last Thursday, I was in bed watching Lost.  Emma was brushing her teeth.  I heard this awful crack of lightning and then the whole house shook.  The antique plates on the wall in my bedroom slammed back on the wall.  Emma came running.  The dog came running.  I thought "good grief that was a close strike".   We all went to sleep no big deal.  Friday morning we realized where it hit and why my plates slammed back down on the wall in my bedroom.

Yes, it hit my big oak tree next to my driveway.  The shards that blew off hit my front porch, which shares a wall with my bedroom.  The tree is not burned, not split in half... just this strange spiral stripe down its side.  We were just amazed.  Here everything was taking about the pea sized hail.. ha ha ha

and I have actually been crocheting.  Crocheting food for Emma's kitchen.  I have no pics yet.  I have been making hot cross buns for Em's easter basket. 

The only thing that has not turned is my job.  I am getting more piled on me.  I am just not happy with the way things are going.  There just seems to be no identification with the fact people do have lives they want to live outside of the office.  I will just have to see how things go for now.  I just need to find a job I can be happy with.  Something I enjoy.  I do not want to do something I do not enjoy for the rest of my life- I mean, how much fun is that. 

Things could be well, better

My job woes are still so ever present.  I do not like my boss... I used to like my job... well, that was until my boss delegated EVERYTHING he does not want to deal with to me.  I could handle my job the way it was before, but my boss just keeps piling on more with unrealistic expectations.  I just do not know what to do.. the unhappiness in my job has well spilled over into my personal life.  I have gained weight, quite a bit, I have no time to do anything or energy to work out.  I am gripe... and worst of all, any creative mojo I had is just gone.  I really mean... gone....  There is also the dealing with Emma's father.   AND the fact we have had some nasty stomach virus in our household... yuck!

I know others before me have gone through this, and lived to talk about it... but I just do not know what to do.  I know, find another job, but good luck in this environment.  I really want to find a job closer to home that does not involve as much stress.  It just seems that I need something with less stress and where I am able to be more available for Emma's activities.

I feel I have a lot of soul searching to do.   Boy this makes me think about when I was in college.  I was so hell bent on being a "city girl" with a big job.  I should have spent a lot more time paying attention to those Ag boys.  Oh to live on a farm.. that would be the life for me.   Get up and work on the farm every day.  Horses, cows, sheep, chickens goats...  I keep saying  that if I ever won a bunch of money, I would chuck all this and buy a farm.  Oh how I would love it.  Yes it would be hard work, but a different kind of hard work.

I have to find my craft mojo SOON.  But Em and I are going to do a big purge this weekend.  Then I can get the house in order and start crafting again.  I have a urge to do some embroidery in a big way.  Maybe some over the shoulder bags for Em and I.  That way when we go on nature walks we will have somewhere to put the loot plus all the crayons and paper for rubbings..... 

We have lift off

I hope everyone had a wonderful Valentine's Day.  We did not do a whole lot,but it was 70 degrees outside so for the first hour home we just played outside... and Audrey loved it! She just loves getting to go outside.  Of course today is another story - our high today will only be 37.  Fun for Audrey, stinks for us!

Well, little Miss Audrey has reached another milestone in the short two weeks we have had her, both of her ears are up, Pembroke Welsh Corgi style.. it is so cute

you cannot see it, but she really has a lot of red from her parents on the back of her ears. 

Well, I have got to go get ready for my artic Friday.   The groundhog was definitely correct, 6 more weeks of winter.  Unfortunately, I cannot turn around and go back to bed for those 6 weeks like Phil!